Top 5 Reasons to Love The Old Train

As Alice pointed out, I haven't complained about the LIRR in a while. Well, ok, if the readers demand it...

Background: the LIRR got pretty nice new trains about 10 years ago but every once in a while, you get stuck with an old one, which feature such lovely amenities as....


1. Every seat held together with duct tape.

2. The stylish "wood" paneling.

3. The Seal of the State of New York wallpaper.

4. The short seat on the end. Enjoy your nap.

5. Not pictured: the lights and heat turning off every time there's a gap in the third rail (which is often).


I guess it makes me grateful for my regular train. How about you, lovers and friends, what's your public transportation like? I bet you're riding in style.

Alice Guest Post #2 - Sandy, Part I

Check out Alice's original guest post here, in case you forgot about her confusing living-at-home plight.


Sandy, Part I

Has anyone noticed that Jill’s recent posts have no mention of commuting? That’s because she completely abandoned me the last two weeks. While Jill was playing board games and rediscovering old phones I was sleeping on couches and shoving my way into packed trains.

At first I was ok with things. Worked closed, the power went out in the afternoon and I spent the evening reading by candles and drinking wine. Tuesday the lack of electric got a little old and as I drove around surveying the downed power lines I started realizing it would be a while till flicking on a light switch actually did anything. But we were lucky, trees only fell in the yard and my family was safe. 

Just as I was starting to understand the full damage of the storm work emails began flooding my inbox. I received a call from my boss briefly asking about how I was and then following up with questions regarding exhibition vinyl placement. Apparently Sotheby’s was open and this was the beginning of a bizarre juxtaposition that would last the week. See, while people had lost their homes and were without power and water the auction house was functioning as if nothing had happened; because on the Upper East Side nothing really had. I told my boss that I was fine, gave instructions on where to place the text, and assured him I’d figure out how to get in the following morning. I packed a suitcase, headed to a house with a generator and started calling friends who live uptown.

Ms. PC: She's staying in the city now while I commute alone, so I don't really want to hear her crap.

Happy Friday, Or, May This Infernal Week Crawl Back Into The Pits Of Hell From Which It Sprang

Rough week, dear lovers and friends (just for fun). 

On Monday I discovered a minor data error I had made at work and have been spending the rest of the week trying to undo everything that resulted from it. Funny how something tiny can blow up like that.

honey boo boo knows what I'm talkin' about

Things I've neglected this week:

• Following up with Penn Station lost & found (yes, still);
• Hitting up the pashmina guy (I got a tip that he's at 32nd and 7th);
• Unpacking;
• Various plans / calls with friends;
• Any physical activity whatsoever.

Things I have not neglected this week:

• Work;
• Eating, for the most part;
• Pissing off some girl on the LIRR by tapping her on the shoulder (still learning commuter culture).

Things I haven't even attempted but need to get on top of:

• Daddy's house. 
• That's enough of a to do list.

But my BFF Rachel is visiting this weekend so I guess I'll just drink a bunch of wine instead.

guessing it will look something like this...

Quick Life Update + Beyonce

I apologize that my posts have been a little less frequent but I have good reasons, which are:

a) I'm moving;

b) I'm working on script writing; and

c) I left my bag on the LIRR that had a bunch of Tom heads in it (another story) and also my memory card reader so now I can't get all the awesome blog photos that I've been taking off my camera and there's only a Staples Express by my office and they sell cameras and memory cards but not memory card readers and I should have just ordered another one on Amazon but I was dumb enough to think the LIRR Lost & Found might function as intended and ugghhhh....

But I promise to all my loyal readers (I know you are out there even though you never leave comments or any trace of your existence but then when I talk to you in person you tell me you're reading so I'll take your word for it) that I will get out at least two posts a week. And this one doesn't count.

This has been a very train-of-thoughty announcement.

And now, a photo collage of Beyonce from Saturday's Jay Z show at the Barclay's Center...

Ms. PC ♥ Ms. KC

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MTV has an awesome photo gallery that I was afraid to steal from. More about the concert later.

On Commuting

Some thoughts on commuting...

Ok, so... I'm going to commute for a few months... possibly longer (eek!) and it's going to suck. But then I'm either going to move back into the city or, failing that, get a job on Long Island. I don't understand people for whom this is the life plan. Like, you're ok with never having a life or seeing your kids and shit?

Alice: Yeah, no. I can't. I'll just get a job curating the Hecksher Park Museum.

Aunt Kath had to commute into the city last week for training but she works on Long Island...

Aunt Kath: I don't understand it! Who are these people? Who would choose to do this everyday?
Cutie (realizing I'm right there): Yeah, it's for the young.
Aunt Kath: It's for the stupid!

Well said, Aunt Kath. Well said.

But my new blogfriend from blurtblog made me realize I should just be grateful for the option of alcohol during the commute.

Alice got fancy wine (and fancy wine glasses) for Monday's ride home

credit: Alice

So, explain it to me! What makes you ok with commuting 1.5+ hours indefinitely? Do you just love your job but can't move? Do you love where you live so much that you would never think of moving? Or, if you don't commute, feel free to rub it in my face.

I need answers, people.

First Week Commuting

A Journal.

Day 1: Did you know that it's dark out at 6am? 

yeah, I was really tired but that's a window 
(with a Christmas candle in it because my mom thinks they're for year-round)

"The first day isn't that bad. It's the second day that makes you want to die..." Alice warns.

Evening - get a ride home with Daddy. Would have been faster to take the train.

Day 2: Did you know it's cold and rainy at 6am? (sometimes)

Umbrella? Check. Coat and boots? Packed: whereabouts unknown.

Evening - resist the urge to buy beer on the platform.

Queens hotspot

Day 3: Did you know that it's even darker at 5:30am? 

Leave the house at 6:35 to be at work at 8:30.

Evening - train home smells like a urinal cake, which is preferable to alternatives.

Day 4: Snoozed 3 times.

Complete thought: Penn Station is bad for your mental and physical health.

Evening - take the 7 train the wrong way one stop. Sounds about right.

Day 5: Don't act like your'e doing me any favors, Friday.

Just can't get excited about Friday today; it was too hard-earned.

Evening - train cancelled. Do not resist the urge to buy a beer.

But first have to go to this ATM that will definitely not steal my identity.

watch the happy dancing guy :) nothing shady

You heard it here first: the cheapest beer in NYC is at the Hunters Point LIRR station.

I sprung for an imported

these are my people now

Upshot: I survived the week.

Photo Shoot Fail

Sorry for the delay in posting this week.  I was trying to get a good picture of Alice and me before I posted her intro.

This was the result...

take 1

no glasses?

with flash?

nailed it.

Alice is the least photogenic person I know and I mean that as a compliment. Not my best work either.

Update!  I had this photo on my computer the whole time!!! *smacks head*

Guest Post: Alice of Huntington

My first week of commuting would have been infinitely more miserable without the guidance of my friend and seasoned commuter, Alice. More on that later...

Alice and I have come up with a mutually beneficial arrangement whereby I get a break once in a while and Alice gets to vent her frustration without the effort of starting her own blog.

If this helps my blog go viral (which she's assured me it will) you'll be hearing more from Alice...

couldn't find a non-drunk pic of us

so why not go all out? cir. 2007

In June 2011 I decided to pack up and leave the east coast for a job at Crystal Bridges Museum in Bentonville, Arkansas to follow my dream of working in the arts. It went pretty well for a while, but for a myriad of reasons in July of 2012 I loaded all my possessions into a pod and headed back to NY.

Everyone keeps saying “Wow you must be so happy to be back!” Well, yes. And also, no. See, moving across country is really expensive and in Arkansas I paid $750 for a three bedroom two bathroom duplex. I’m not sure I could rent a closet in the south Bronx for that amount. So in order to get my finances in order I’ve moved back home.

Well, not exactly “home.” I’m living with my ex-stepfather Brian (my mother’s second husband, she’s now married to someone else) in his recently deceased ex-wife’s (the woman he was married to before my mother) house in Dix Hills. Still with me? My commute is a little over two hours each way and Brian very nicely drops me off and picks me up from the Huntington train station – kind of like when I was 12 and would go to the mall.

Soo…this is going to be interesting. At least I now have Jill to commiserate and have drinks at Tracks with.

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